Complicated injuries...

I played basketball last night for the first time in... ages, and managed to get myself a little souvenir within the first 5 minutes of play:

"Oww..."

Looks rather nasty but it doesn't really hurt that much. In fact, it doesn't really bother me at all - until you ask me how i got it.

I fell on a net.

...

And yes, this is precisely when people start asking, "How the hell did you manage that?"

And that is exactly the trouble i've been getting with injuries, lately - i seem to be getting injured in such incredibly complicated and unusual ways, that I often end up sounding like I'm making things up. Which is annoying, of course. Don't believe me? Try this:

I intercepted an inbound pass but tipped the ball out of the court. So i ran for the loose ball, jumped before the out-of-bounds line, caught the ball with one hand and tried swinging it back into the court before my foot touched the ground. Which would have happened without incident if there wasn't a futsal court next to the basketball court. Now you see, futsal courts have these nets wrapped around them to keep the ball in - and i was about to land on one of these nets. Usually this wouldn't be a problem if I was approaching the net square on since i could just land on it. Unfortunately, i was approaching it at an angle, which meant that I'd scrape diagonally across it unless i landed on my feet. Which I couldn't because of a long, thin, wooden plank that fastens the net onto the floor. i couldn't step on anything without risk of breaking my ankle because - with the hard and strong net fastened to it, it had formed a VERY uneven surface beneath my right foot. So i tried shuffling my feet as i was falling, but still couldn't get a foothold - and all the while, my whole body weight was supported by my right elbow, which was now scraping itself diagonally across the net as i fell down into a crumpled heap. Which is how i got this massive scar...

There! You SEE? It sounds like I made it up!!! The problem is that I can't just say "I fell on a net" and leave it at that because it sounds stupid, and I can't just say "I got it while playing basketball" because people will then ask if I fell down, I'd say no and I'd then have to tell them about the net, which would lead me back to square one.

AAAAAARGH~!!!

My previous injury was also basketball-related: I sprained my ankle because someone fell on me...

...

"How the hell do you sprain an ankle that way? Don't you have to step on an uneven surface or jump and land wrongly? Or trip while running?"

"No," I'd respond. "My teammate ran into a screen, bounced off it and landed on my leg right below the knee - laterally. With his whole body weight."

You see the trend here?

And years ago, I managed to fall into a huge drain because my mum or dad (can't remember) parked too close to the drain and as i got out of the car, my mum told me not to fall into the drain, thus diverting my attention from the ground at the precise moment where paying attention to where i was stepping would've been quite important.

You see?

Why can't i just slip and fall like other normal people? Sigh...