The web as we know it is already flooded with thousands of useless websites. This is another one of them... Come here for occasional tech news, angsty stuff and other tidbits. Updated occasionally.
Just got my Nikon D70 back from the service centre when I bumped into this car in traffic:
It's a learner driver. Slow, hogs up the left lane and often stalls at traffic lights during rush hour. This one's got a handicapped driver, though - hence the picture of a wheelchair next to the license plate and a little sign that says:
Hmm... I've seen those fonts somewhere before.It's now the season of Lent, which according to the Catholic faith is a time of fasting - to freely abstain from stuff you'd normally like to do (there's a lot more reasoning behind this, apparently).
Some give up chocolate. Others stop drinking alcohol. Most Catholics would take Fridays as a day to abstain from meat - simply because it's yummy and shit.
I am catholic, and therefore, I shall abstain from meat on Fridays too. Because I believe in God and I am a very very good boy.
But it seems that I've not been fasting properly for the past 27 years of my life, as I've recently discovered.
The following conversation is an excerpt from an online chat session:
me: Are you done with work yet? I come pick you up.
Elaine: no need
finish your work
i have stuff i can do here still. ... housekeeping etc...
me: T_T
Elaine: dun worry
me: ok... i hurry
Elaine: dun worry
don stress
had big lunch ... am not hungry
me: ah...
you do realise we're supposed to be vegetarian today, right? :)
Elaine: erm
chicken is a vegetable
it is
me: Oh... really???
So my mum has been lying all this while!!!
Elaine: yes ... um ... yes, she has
because i would never eat anything but a vegetable-chicken on fridays during lent
me: yes...
Ah... so THAT'S how they grow chickens!!!
They plant the eggs IN THE GROUND!!!
Elaine: YES!
The chickens get cut off their stalks when they are big enough to ... erm ... make a tasty vegetable dish
-----------------------
Shortly after, the following mental image appeared in my head:
Click to enlarge
Being the self-appointed English language guru that I am, I often take pride in correcting the grammar of my friends and family members - just to show off my superiority superior English.
I also taunt Chinese-educated PR/marketing people over the phone with a supposed English accent (It's true! Ah Bengs and La Las can't tell the difference).
It's quite simple, just speak like one of those Indian English teachers you had in primary school and omit all the aar's and lah's from your speech. (FYI, there's an incredibly detailed guide to Malaysian English in Wikipedia)
And what I've just realised is that, because the standard of English is quite poor in Malaysia, it is possible to impose incorrect grammar/vocabulary on people (Accidentally, of course).
Take the following conversation I had with Aloy, for example:
I love Singapore Zoo. It's one of the few places I can visit several times and still look forward to each trip - mostly because of the fantastic photographic opportunities it presents.
Another small primate, the Cotton-Eared Marmoset is also found in South America. But unlike the Cottontop Tamarin, it seems to be doing fine, which is strange when you consider how it's the same size and shares the same habitat and diet.
This is a Giraffe. It is tall (up to 18ft), does everything standing (even sleeping), has the same number of bones in its neck as a human (that's seven, if you're wondering) and has no voice. And, a single kick from a giraffe can kill a man. Yes, this is a giraffe. Yes it is.
Whoever gave the Jackass Penguin its name obviously had a lot of fun. It's a medium-sized penguin (grows slightly over 2ft tall) found off the southern coast of Africa. They are currently a vulnerable species because of pollution, changes to their habitat and because their eggs taste damn good. Apparently. They normally live for up to 10 years, although some specimens have been known to live for up to 40 years in controlled environments (i.e. in an aquarium with optimum space, temperatures, diets and loads of stupid children making silly faces at them).
It's an iguana! And it's bloody ugly. Well, not sure what else to say, really. I don't particularly like lizards - they give me the creeps...
Often confused with leopards (wait... these are jaguars, right?), jaguars are big cats with spots all over their bodies, though they sometimes have very dark fur instead. Found only in South America, jaguars are very similar to tigers in that they're solitary animals, live in dense jungles and actually like swimming (just try dipping your cat into a tub of water...). Their method of attack is damn cool, though - because they have much stronger jaws than most other animals, they are able to bite right through the skulls of its prey, stabbing their brains to death until they die.
This is the backside of a zebra, normally found on its posterior (e.g. the opposite end to the one with eyes, a mouth, a pair of nostrils and long, goofy looking ears). It also isn't a very good place to stand for at least three very good reasons.
Here, we see an orange-coloured bird eating another orange-coloured bird of the same species. Which is actually rather good for the bird on the left because its usual diet of fruits, seeds and insects is rubbish. Just be wary if one of these little buggers land on your shoulders - they could lop off your head in a single peck. Honest.
On my latest trip to Singapore Zoo last week, I managed to shoot the white tigers again ('shoot' as in 'click', not 'bang!'). This time, I caught them during feeding time, which is probably the best time since they're not just sitting around like housecats.
Karaoke is cool!
I managed to catch one of Jun Kit's classic renditions of Fantasia Bulan Madu (A fantastic song performed by Malay rock band Search and written by M. Nasir) on video.
And thanks to the wonders of technology (i.e. YouTube), now you can see this performance in the comfort of your office cubicle.
It should be noted that Jun Kit sings this song better than 90% of the Malay population. In fact, we believe that Jun Kit is more Malay than Hanif (pictured in the background). We also believe that Hanif is gay, but that's a different story altogether.
All that's missing is the long hair and tight jeans...
Enjoy :)
Yes... thanks to the many connections I have with the IT industry, I was able to get hold of an iPhone - the first in Malaysia!
Well, an origami version, actually... (Go to Gizmodo for more info) But since the real thing won't be out till June, this will have to do. And since it's to scale, I believe we can provide a rather accurate review of Apple's revolutionary new product.
First of all, we start with the packaging:
The iPhone comes on a single sheet of A4 paper, with convenient cutout lines. A pair of scissors are required. Whilst easy to assemble, I find it appalling that an Apple product would require any sort of self-assembly. Should've worked right out of the box...
After folding the iPhone together, I marvelled at its 3.5in static inkjet display. The much-hyped Multi-touch screen by Apple didn't seem to be as responsive as I'd hope. But on the bright side, the iPhone weighs just 7 grams, which is about 1/153 the weight of a 20GB iPod. Well done, Apple!
And unlike the iPod, the iPhone seems rather scratch resistant too.
As a phone, the iPhone rocks! The reception is fantastic, with a continuous full bar from Maxis no matter where I was - even in underground carparks, elevators and stuff. In spite of the excellent reception, I wasn't able to make any calls. In fact, the date and time seemed to be stuck too, which is a bit of a problem. However, I'm sure that Apple's engineers will sort these little gremlins out.
Below the iPhone, there's the usual iPod dock connector, though this one seems a bit bigger. While it seemed to fit with my old iPod USB cables, docked speakers and other stuff, it wasn't able to sync properly. Even after installing the latest version of iTunes, I still couldn't get it to work. Sheesh... Once again, I'm sure it'll all be sorted out.
Aha... if you thought it was just an iPod, a phone and a breakthrough Internet communications device, I'll have you know that the iPhone has a 2-megapixel camera too! While I'm sure the optics are of first-class quality, there seems to be a problem with the viewfinder, which always shows a clownfish no matter where I point the iPhone.
But at least it's a very sharp looking clownfish with good colours and automatic exposure - better than anything else I've seen in the market (like those Nokia N-series things). Excellent job, Apple. Best looking clownfish shots... EVER!
And of course, the iPhone also raises your sex appeal by about 362%. Don't worry about picking up girls in bars - let the girls come to you! With an iPhone, every girl between 18 and 30 years will want to have your children. Really.
Conclusion
Whilst I'm very impressed with the iPhone, I can't help but feel that Apple rushed this product out to get a head start in front of the competition. And then, there's the problem with it creasing whenever I put it into my pockets. But who cares... it's an iPhone. It's cool. Everybody wants one. Get one today :)
Pros: Light, excellent battery life, superb high-resolution screen, perfect reception.
Cons: None of the advertised functions work.
"Yes, papaya can cause impotence...
because you'll be too busy shitting."
- Ronald Byrne
If you happen to be rich and slightly tasteless at the same time (seems pretty common these days), here's another great way to burn up your daddy's hard-earned ringgit.
Some company called MyFrost is offering a rather weird service - pay them dollops of cash, bring along your phone/iPod/notebook to meet with their consultants and they'll completely sheath it in pretty Swarovski crystals... Hundreds of them.
So yes, it'll probably cost you an arm and half a torso. If you like this sort of stuff, then good for you.
What's rather hilarious, though, is the company's website (http://www.myfrost.com.my/) - Or rather, its FAQ page, which is the most childish, attitude-filled FAQ I've ever read!
Examples include:
Really? "Lesser known"...? I haven't even heard of MyFrost in the first place! And while its ok for them to copy a style from another country, it is apparently uncool for other people to do the same.
"Shoddy jobs" done by others? So does that imply that MyFrost's works are indestructible?
I think not... they tell you how they use some special bonding process to fix the crystals onto your gear, and later tell you to simply use superglue to fix the stuff back if they fall off. Observe:
Classic... :)
Sheesh... I feel so bitchy now. Need to take a shower...
P.S: If you happen to be from MyFrost and are reading all this at the moment, I do apologise if you feel like tearing my head off. But you can't, so nyah-nyah-nyah-nyah-nyah :P
In any case, do grow up.
This is the Tip of Borneo, located at the Northernmost tip of Sabah. Apparently, the local government didn't know about this place until fairly recently.
And when they realised the enormous potential financial gains from an remote, untouched, tourist spot, they decided to build some sort of monument and to erect a flag to remind people that this is, in fact, Malaysia.
And this ball-shaped thing here is the Nip of Borneo...
And here are a couple of tourists from the mainland, still charmed by the quaintness of it all.
And this here is the tip itself! Head north from here, and you'll end up in Taiwan or something...
And to spice things up a bit, there are a small collection of funky rock formations by the shoreline.
One thing nice about TTOB (The Tip of Borneo), is the really nice, empty beach next to it. So far, nobody's thought of corrupting the area with some tasteless beach resort. The water's really clean too - can use to brush your teeth!!!
Wanton acts of violence...
Then the following picture needs no caption:
(Note: Yes, that's Sylvane and Hanif during Palany's wedding dinner in Penang.)
On another note, I apologise for the lack of updates. So many things have happened in the past month that I absolutely had no time to blog. Or rather, I was so tired out / sick / outstation at the time that the last thing on my mind was to compile all my photos and think of something witty to say.
Normal services should resume from henceforth.
Those of you who've known me for a bit longer than 10 years may recall that I used to draw a lot in my free time (and during classes - and on my textbooks). But alas, my artistic talents are fairly limited (more cartoony than realistic) and thus my dreams of becoming a professional cartoonist evaporated soon before my schooling days were over.
But I enjoy drawing comics, it's a really great way to express oneself and it also happens to be a lot of fun. So here it is - my first comic strip in over 10 years:
